irony sucks

This is cruelly ironic. Just yesterday, I posted a blog in which I mentioned that no one is enough on his or her own and that we all need God. God is the only One who is enough.

Today was another insecure day. I don't know what this is. I don't want to blame it on "hormones" because, frankly, I don't think this is what it is. At the same time, I don't want to say that I'm under spiritual attack, because, frankly, I don't think that there's anything I'm doing or anything that's about to break that the devil wouldn't want to have happen.

Regardless of what it is that is causing me to feel so insecure, I feel less than enough. And this is the ironic part. I know that I can never be enough of anything to satisfy, or whatever. And I know that in God's eyes, that's okay. He's got my back, and with Him, I can be enough; and He can use me in His plans. But I have this nagging thought in my head that to people I know, I'll never be enough. I'll never be smart enough, pretty enough, confident enough, spiritual enough, fun enough, enough of a leader, to measure up to others' standards. And this is driving me crazy. I know that I don't need to do that. What people think of me is nothing in comparison to what God thinks of me. If I don't measure up to what people think, big deal!

I know that. And yet, I still feel like it's not sticking. Why, oh why, does my mind war against itself?