a matter of weight

I have a hard time with America's concept of weight. Growing up in Africa, big was beautiful. Certainly the slender women were considered attractive as well, but no one looked down noses at women who were not a svelte size four. In fact, I never felt poorly about my weight while living in Africa...except when I was attending an American boarding school. Then, even though I was a healthy weight--even skinny--I felt the judgmental looks from some of my classmates.

Now, in the US, I am assaulted by images of women who are size six or smaller--usually a lot smaller--and I'm back to feeling abnormal again. I know that those sizes are unrealistic for most women--who is a size 0 anyway? Doesn't that mean you don't exist anymore?--but I still feel like I stand out. I know personally women who are not tiny tiny and who I still consider very beautiful women. At the same time, I look at myself--of average American size--and I see myself as very overweight. This is insane.

But this is the opinion that American women have of themselves. What about American men's opinions of women? Do they match up? I've found that they don't...but at the same time, they do. Allow me to explain: most guys I've talked to like girls "with a little extra on them"--they don't like girls who are skeletons because they're afraid that they'll break them...or this makes girls less cuddly, or whatever. But at the same time, you don't often see guys pursuing girls who are above average in size.

What gives?