see saw

I feel like I'm an emotional see-saw right now. I have my ups and downs and they pretty much balance each other out. I guess that's really life, isn't it? Life is cyclical, life comes in waves. Good times. Bad times. In between times. How zen.

I'm currently somewhat in the middle because I have both extremes fighting for my attention. So they've successfully canceled each other out and I am now in the middle. Usually I like being in the middle, but right now, since each side is beating the crap out of the other side, I'm not particularly fond of this situation.

My parents are leaving today.

I'll see them at Christmas break, so this isn't the end of our familial relationships. I will be seeing them relatively soon. And THEN there is the huge break of not seeing them for about two years--at least until grad. But I can handle this. I've dealt with international separation before, I think I can handle this.

And for some reason, today I feel very worn out. I got enough sleep last night, my classes aren't wearing me out this week, and I've eaten enough to keep my blood sugar at a decent level. But maybe there are more underlying emotions that I'm not owning up to at the moment. Maybe that's why I feel so dead today. (bleh)

After class ends this afternoon, I'm going with my parents to the airport and dropping them off, saying goodbye. I don't know if Ty will be going with me or Eli. I almost want to go by myself and have that personal time with my parents. I kind of want to have the drive back to school by myself so that I don't have to deal with people trying to comfort me.

I kind of want to do this on my own. Yikes....maybe that's not such a good thing. *shrug* Oh well.