strange, but GOOD

Today has been kind of a weird day, but so good. Allow me to explain. It's been a very peaceful day--which lately in my life is WEIRD. Things that would normally stress me out--certain people and classes--have not affected me negatively today. Stressors have just rolled off me like water off a duck's back. This is a wonderful relief.

I guess in a way, I've been testing God's deliverance because I doubt. I'm such a faithless person sometimes. Thomas and I have a LOT in common in that respect. But this is somewhat down a rabbit trail.

I was presented with several situations today that normally would--as aforementioned--set me off in various ways. One encounter that normally incites irrational jealousy and/or anxiety incited nothing but friendly banter and genuine conversation. Praise the Lord! When this happened, I mentally went to other subjects that would elicit similar responses and felt...nothing of the kind. When one feels bound by these types of emotions and suddenly they're gone. It's strange. Again, good...but weird.

The class that typically frustrates me and induces major bad attitude did not. Instead, I was able to listen patiently to the prof and discuss my paper with her so that I could fully understand what she was asking of us. (Still not absolutely positive if I get what she's saying, but I have a better feeling about it than I did previously.)

Generally, I've felt peaceful, like no matter the chaos that gets thrown my way, it will somehow be manageable. Furthermore, I am not fixating on my wild emotions. Instead, I have the feeling that it is possible for me to not focus on my issues for awhile. At least, until I have the opportunity to deal with them in a positive, concentrated situation, they will not oppress me.


EDIT: 11:08pm~ I just got blindsided by anxiety. God, when will this end? Are you trying to tell me something through this horrible feeling or is it just me? Okay...I felt something of a calm come over me, so...just me, right? Even calmer. Okay...breathe...pray...read scripture. ...where's my Bible?